Throughout our lives, the question arises again and again: when is the point where we can allow ourselves to say no? 

Where do we draw our own boundaries?
We become insecure, we become doubtful, and we let a thought come over us that makes us start to doubt ourselves.

Over the years, I have become increasingly concerned about what it means to take responsibility for ourselves, our actions and their consequences.
In human relationships, this theme is particularly important because we all have different life journeys, carrying different wounds, experiences and desires. 

But what happens when the question of responsibility becomes distorted, and compassion is replaced by selfishness, boundary violations and moral drift?
In Buddhism, every action and word we speak is a kind of energy that reflects back on us and our environment.
When we are involved in the life of a community, at work, in our family relationships, in our human relationships or even during a retreat or camp, we have a responsibility not only to ourselves but also to each other.
The energy we bring into a space determines whether that space becomes supportive or toxic.
In walking the path of dharma, it is important to recognise that compassion and humility are key, but this should not mean sacrificing oneself to the whims of others.

Drawing borders is not selfishness, it is self-defence.

When one respects one's own needs and limitations, one teaches others where one's personal space begins and ends.
However, it is worth paying attention to how much those boundaries are respected by the community of which you are a part when you draw your own boundaries.
Sometimes they ignore you and try to influence and manipulate you at the expense of others because they sense a power within you that they can no longer influence.
This can result not only in the breakdown of relationships, but also in damage to the community as a whole.
This is particularly painful when it comes to people with whom we have had some level of connection, trust or confidence.

Moral issues are always present when a community gathers.
According to Western philosophy, morality is the basis of humanity, i.e. respecting the humanity of others and not exploiting each other for selfish ends.. When someone forgets this basic respect and abuses a situation, it is not only their own moral failure, but also harms all those who are connected to each other for a common purpose.
Low-vibrational behaviour - such as manipulation, exploitation and insensitivity to others - runs deeply counter to everything we learn through dharma.
Such energies are toxic, and are often born of fear, resentment and inner disorder.
Recognising and dealing with these is a fundamental task for everyone, because they are the traps and perspectives that can lead us astray.

Taking responsibility means not only acknowledging our mistakes, but also respecting the position and feelings of others.
When someone takes responsibility for their actions in front of you, it is not right to play the role of a victim, because you are not only deceiving yourself, but you are also denying yourself the opportunity to learn from the responsibility they have already set an example for you.

Buddhism teaches that every difficulty we face is an opportunity for progress.
However, if one is constantly blaming others and refusing to face one's own shadows, one is not only holding oneself back, but also preventing others from rising.

In such situations, the biggest challenge is to maintain our inner peace and elevation.
Low vibrations, malice and hurtful behaviour can make us feel insecure, but inner guidance will always point us in the direction of love and wisdom.

When we act with a clear heart, clear boundaries and inner discipline, our energy protects ourselves and others from toxic influences.

Ultimately, our responsibility lies in representing justice, compassion and determination at the same time.
Let's not let the undignified behaviour of others bring us down, but rather use these situations to further tune into our inner dharma and set an example for those who may be going astray.

When we find ourselves in situations where our limits are constantly being tested, we often wonder if we are doing the right thing when we say no, when we stand up for ourselves

At such times, it is important to find our inner truth and remind ourselves that we must follow our own dharma in every situation.. The inner guidance that comes from pure intention will always show the way, even if it is sometimes confrontational.

Maintaining our identity, even when we may be exploited or manipulated by others, is not just about protecting ourselves.
This is the basis of our inner authenticity, which allows us to make clear to others where our boundaries lie. If we are brave enough to be honest about who we are, we open up space for others to connect with us.

In life, we often face situations where we need to find a balance between compassion and firmness.
Buddhism teaches us that true compassion does not mean bowing to the will of others in every situation, but being able to communicate our boundaries lovingly but clearly.
Compassion does not mean unconditional indulgence; part of love is being firm when we see someone behaving in a harmful way.

When one abuses compassion or ignores the needs of others for one's own convenience, it is no longer connection, but exploitation. In such cases, the greatest lesson we can give is to show them that love and respect can never mean subordination.

When we find ourselves in a human relationship or community where low vibrations dominate and self-interest, manipulation or disrespect come to the fore, it is especially important to keep our own vibration and inner truth.
Situations like these give us the opportunity to practice keeping our inner peace and not letting external circumstances distract us from our dharma.

The greatest strength often lies in standing up for ourselves, quietly but firmly. Pure, loving energy will always find its way, even in the midst of turmoil. It's worth remembering that inner elevation is not dependent on the behaviour of others.
Real progress begins when we are no longer defined by external circumstances, but rise above them.

Be proud of yourself if you're at the point where you can take responsibility for everything.

Be proud of yourself when you no longer need to be a victim.

Be proud of yourself if love shows up when you push your own boundaries.